this problem is going to last more then the weekend.

why is it that music can make you feel so close to something, but not actually be close to it at all. it makes you feel like everything is going to be okay, when in reality you know it won't be ookay.

maybe you won't be okay, maybe you wont smile forever and be happy. And maybe just maybe youll crumble down and fall. but even thinking about that then listening to one happy song makes you reconsider your life. Your surroundings and it makes you realize life in the end will be worth it.

It will be worth growing up, and moving on. Leaving the life a simple teenager lives and becoming something way more important in the world.
Something you won't know until you mature enough to say youre mature.

Something you wont know until your smile is real.

i have been thinking a lot lately, and i am not sure if i like what i am thinking about.
i got into school for next year for tv and radio journalism. and i know thats what i want to do, and i know ill be good at it, its just scary.
thinking about someone actually "reading" my writing, and me writing for a living.
i don't know if its possible for me?

I also don't know what love is, well i mean i fully know what it is.
i feel it all the time.
the one thing i don't understand is why if everyone says its the best feeling in the world, why you feel so fucking shitty when plans get ruined or you don't talk to a special someone all day.
it may be the best feeling in the world, but it sure as hell can put knots in your stomach.

fact; i miss you..